its not stalking. its research.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
