Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize