sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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