We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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