Dual....:-)
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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