I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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