apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
