And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
