I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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