Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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