This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
