You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
