Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize