My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
