he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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