Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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