I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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