He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
Randomize
