That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Green mimosas i think yes
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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