She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Plan B is the new Plan A
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
