if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize