why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
