He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
