i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Randomize
