I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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