careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
did you just send me my own nude
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
