can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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