but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize