Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
