Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Randomize
