covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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