He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
