And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Im part way to drunk.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
