took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
