I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
