Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
