Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
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