It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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