The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
