I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
