hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
