He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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