can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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