ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
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