There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
