You really coming over, don't trick.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
Randomize
