OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
there was a trapeze. enough said
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
How does it feel to date your dad?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
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