sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i permit you to call me
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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