i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize