I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Multitasking record: pooping whilst putting on shoes and cleaning ear with q-tip. All while texting.
Update: fell off toilet, one shoe on, q-tip still in ear. Not a pro.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
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