FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize